I've been away from this for a while. For a couple of reasons, 1) havent had any work I thought was worth showing. 2) Certain events with the family.
On the 25th of October my cousin's son celebrated his 4th birthday. 5 days later he died. We buried him soon after on the 6th of November. He died of leukaemia. His name was Darnell.
I didnt know him as well as I could of, I wish I spended more time with him then I did. Its strange we were given the news he would die in a couple of weeks... but it didnt sink in. I guess I always believed he would pull through. I remember when I got the news he died, I had just got off the phone with my girlfriend Joanne for 2 seconds and my dad called. I was in a happy mood obviously after chatting to Jo and my dad came out straight with it... he mentioned "Do you remember the times when I told you to go see him..." I felt so shitty. I had just seen him a week before. I was obviously upset, Jo comforted me.
Its strange, for a while I've been questioning my faith... sort of straying from beliefs in God. But after his death, I remember thinking to myself that I REALLY do hope he is in a better place. Some where he likes... its just to depressing to think that this guy went through 4 years of pain just to die like that and have experienced hardly anything.

I think of him from time to time, tell him what I've done and whats been up. I ask him for help and to watch over people. Its horrible I never made an effort when he was alive to be with him...and I've blasted myself for being that asshole. I was effected like the rest of the family...maybe not as much as others, but I still felt and feel the pain. My uncle says that his purpose was one of unity. He was someone who believed in love and peace in the household, especially between fighting family members. I guess its true, even after his death hes still bringing love, hes bringing peace and brought family closer together.

Darnell, we love you!